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Freshly Squeezed! It's Mammogram Time!

Last week I had my first of my now yearly mammograms. My second boob squish to date, but the first post treatment.

If you follow me on Instagram you might have already read about the unfortunate start I had with it, but for those of you not over there, basically the the nurse that called me through to the area where you're given the mammogram, looked at me all confused and asked me to take a seat whilst she checked something. When she came back she told me they had me down for a mammogram but it couldn't be right, because I was so young! 

I don't know who it was more awkward for, me or her, when I had to explain it was right and my oncologist had organised it! Queue some chat about my treatment, the fact I still have my hair and my age - lots about my age! She also told me that because treatment only finished in May, it might hurt - and you know what, she wasn't wrong!

If you've not had a mammogram, let me tell you, it's just as unpleasant as you might imagine - you see that black plate on the machine in the photo - you pop your boob on that plate and it's essentially squished hard, like REALLY hard, whilst a nurse scans your boobs and manipulates your arms into strange positions!

But more than the physical pain, the appearance of this mammogram in my diary has had my emotions all over the place. The first time I had a mammogram was closely followed by a nurse telling me she thought I had cancer. It was the start of almost a year of treatment. It was the day when my life literally got turned upside down and I'm still dealing with the fall out of that day. Physically and emotionally. I'm still tired, all the time. I've still got a fog in my brain that makes words disapear from my head. I've still got a whole host of emotions that won't simmer down. And I've still got this fear that it could return!

I know I should be moving on with my life, but when you have appointments like this in the diary, and then a two week wait to see my surgeon following it, it's not the easiest thing to do.  

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Thanks for stopping by and reading my ramblings. I hope to see you again soon.